I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
