while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Your penis caused this!
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
