Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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