you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize