Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
