Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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