it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
