well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize