I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
