My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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