Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize