whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
