i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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