Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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