ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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