she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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