if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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