Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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