last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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