if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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