there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
