yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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