WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
