Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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