im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Hippo gnu deer
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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