Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
