Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
