so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
