It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
People with herpes should wear stickers.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
