Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize