i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
