nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
