im gay
i know
yea but for you.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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