Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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