sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Randomize
