Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
We need to rekindle our bromance
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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