yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Randomize
