just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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