her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
