We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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