My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
