i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
