and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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