She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I will pee on everything he values.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
