I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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