I have demons in me.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I believe in your delicious
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Randomize
