ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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