Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
