i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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