Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
